It's Not Easy Being Caffeine Free

When I was younger I thought all children grew up to get jobs and drink coffee in the morning. Coffee drinking seemed to be a right of passage into the "real" world. If you didn't drink coffee, you didn't know what was up. And since I was a youngster with a tender tongue and no taste for coffee, I used my taste buds as a guage for how far I had to go.

Well, the coffee never caught on at the party that is my mouth. When I do drink it, I must dowse it with sugar and cream, and can you really call that drinking coffee? I certainly don't, although Starbucks makes a killing off of it.

So, either I have still not grown up, or my whole theory about coffee drinking was a complete childhood misunderstanding. I wish to argue that my instincts were not as far off as you might think. I don't think non-coffee drinkers get the same respect as coffee drinkers do.

The first time I met my fiance's parents, they were so shocked I didn't drink coffee that I was afraid they were going to kick me out. While drinking a glass of orange juice, I read an article taped to their fridge about all the benefits a cup of coffee can give you. Funny, it didn't mention any of the bad. I still wonder if, every time I pass up a cup of coffee in front of them if they question my worth.

And just this morning, I went into the kitchen at work to get some hot water for some tea. The hot water dispenser at the cooler was only spewing out tepid water, and the hot water tap on the old coffee maker has been broken for months. I went to complain that there are no amenities for the non coffee drinkers (the coffee lovers in this office just got a brand new espresso machine, ooh la la)...tea drinkers have to work so much harder to get what they want. I should not have complained, and boy, was I put in my place. There's always the microwave, and some people do not have enough time to listen to every little tea drinker's complaint.

So, if you are a tea drinker, or perhaps you need some hot water for your insta-oatmeal, do what you can for now, and take comfort in the knowledge that one day we will be recognized!