What do we do with Pluto?

The loss of Pluto to the solar system planetary family has made us all stop and take notice. Maybe it's our need for soft news after weeks of daily war reports and the upcoming anniversaries of two huge American disasters (Katrina and 9/11). Yes, it is good to have balance.

For some reason, I can't stop thinking about Pluto. I've always thought of it as a potato-shaped ball of ice, with little divots in it for sledding, maybe some flatter spots for ice skating. When I did a report on the planet in the third grade, I drew a snowman shivering for the cover. Now I don't know what to do with my image. Essentially it stays the same. But would I want to take a vacation to Pluto, a dwarf planet, when I could visit a real planet?

The news has far reaching effects. Most notably, on the astrology community. Here is Astrology.com's reaction to the news.

This doesn't mean that you should disregard
Pluto's place in your charts! It hasn't left
the solar system; it's just in a new category.
Historically, astrologers have examined
events in the world at the time of a planet's
discovery for clues about what it represents.
As god of the underworld, Pluto represents
power, transformation, the cycle of death and
rebirth, and the process of breaking down and
rebuilding. And now the status of Pluto itself
is transforming -- a sure sign of its power
and influence! Time will tell if the scope of
Pluto's symbolism will decrease as a result of
its reclassification. In the meantime, Pluto
retains all its astrological significance, as
it continues to orbit our Sun.

Clearly they are worried about the destruction Pluto's demotion will bring to their industry. As they should be. Either we take the road that astrology is a bunch of balogna, an interpretation of "signs" vague enough to make everyone believe the stars are speaking to them, or we buy into the "signs" and take the interpretation further--that Pluto's demise signifies a greater downfall on the mortals. Events in the news would certainly point to this. Coincidence or Balogna? I like the balogna with the little olive pieces in it. Constellation bologna, you might call it, if you were an astrologer or an astronomer.

And the next important issue to be determined-- what about Mickey Mouse's dog? I recall Pluto being a very happy dog, but maybe those days are also numbered. It's a good thing his friends at Disney are supportive, otherwise the dog might have started slipping some tonic in his dog water, if you know what I mean. Here's what those cartoon heads had to say about the news, posted officially on the Disney website:

In reaction to news yesterday that Pluto was demoted to the status of "dwarf planet," the Seven Dwarfs issued their own short statement:

"Although we think it's DOPEY that Pluto has been downgraded to a dwarf planet, which has made some people GRUMPY and others just SLEEPY, we are not BASHFUL in saying we would be HAPPY if Disney's Pluto would join us as an 8th dwarf. We think this is just what the DOC ordered and is nothing to SNEEZE at."

As Mickey Mouse's faithful companion, Pluto made his debut in 1930, the same year that scientists discovered what they believed was a ninth planet.

Said a white-gloved, yellow-shoed source close to Disney's top dog, "I think the whole thing is goofy. Pluto has never been interested in astronomy before, other than maybe an occasional howl at the moon."

As long as Pluto continues to be walked and loved by Mickey, I think everything will be fine in this department.

And what will your reaction be? Will it inspire you to clean out your closets, to get rid of that bikini that really doesn't cover enough flesh to be considered clothing? Will you finally throw away the moldy leftover meatloaf in the back of the fridge, since technically, all the mold on it disqualifies its edible status? Or maybe you'll just sit back and watch life go on as usual. Because really, nothing has changed.


Check out this interview with the ex-planet itself.